Rent an Irish cottage.

How do you know you've seen the "real" Ireland when you go there on holiday? That questions goes for any country of course, and it seems that tourists generally believe that they've seen the real thing only if what they see matches their pre-conceived assumptions of what the place ought to be like, Even Irish people have different ideas and experiences of what constitutes genuine Irish living, and even foreigners who come to live here for a prolonged period of time only get insights into some aspects of Ireland, not Ireland in its entirety.

One misconception is that the Irish are all Catholic, heavy drinkers, red-haired and hate the English - personally I've never met anyone who ticks all those boxes. Nor have I ever seen anyone in the street dressed in what is thought of as "traditional" Irish clothing, whatever that is. Everyone's experience is different. Am I not genuinely Irish if (as is the case) I never get drunk, don't like potatoes, have no interest in emigrating to America and speak fluent Irish which most Irish people do not?

So If you are tempted to come to "do" Ireland you are welcome, just expect us to fit anyone's stereo-typical view of what it is to be Irish, and be done with any romantic nonsense about travelling in a jaunting car.

Much better is to come and live (quietly) not in hotels but in a private house for a week or two. Renting an cottage has become big business, and they are available all over the island and all year round at reasonable prices. Rent one in Donegal or Mayo, in a rural area if you can to experience the feel of isolation, and take one for a day or two in Dublin before you fly back home.

But be warned, there are some things to watch out for:

• It WILL be wet.
• TV reception is not good outside larger towns
• Sheep get everywhere
• It's expensive to eat out
• Signposts on country roads are not to be trusted
• We drive on the LEFT hand side of the road
• Don't order Budweiser by referring to it as Bud - bod (pronounced bud) is Irish for penis.

Have a great holiday.